Small in Front of God

Lately, I can't stop thinking about what God has done in my life. I am so preoccupied with it. Not in a proud way, at all. I'm just amazed at what God has done with me. I spent years and years alone, and then boom! One day I walked into a cafe and met my wife. And God changed my life forever. Our whole story is nothing less than a miracle, something wonderful and beautiful and perfect made by God. I'm sitting here listening to Death Cab's Grapevine Fires and thinking about the future with God. And we were talking and I thought this verse:

Even to your old age and gray hairs

I am he, I am he who will sustain you.

I have made you and I will carry you;

I will sustain you and I will rescue you. Isaiah 46:4 (NIV)

Love with God is hardly a momentary rush. It's hardly a good feeling at church or ecstasy in worship at home. It's a long term relationship. One between not only lovers, but best friends. One of my favorite books is Ecclesiastes.

I want to share a couple verses from it:

All streams flow into the sea, yet the sea is never full. 1:6

How true. This is so true on so many levels. Personal, societal, cultural, spiritual.

I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him. 3:14

Man, that one is true. It's like me and Kayla's love story. It endures forever. Nothing can be added or taken from it (in other words, I wouldn't change a thing about it :). It's perfect. And now, looking at our love story, I feel small before God. Small before my Beloved who gave me everything, made me out of nothing, and gave me life. I feel small because I'm apart of something so much bigger than I am. And the gravity of that is huge. I'm a husband and I'm a father. Because God wrote my life. And I'm just this small person before God and I want to love him and he must be crazy about me to give me everything I have. Because he must see things about me that I never knew were there in the first place. But then when you are in love with Someone, they always see things in you that you never knew existed. And you make them smile when doing things you never thought were important or cute. I know, because of my wife. I think God noticed me too :) And I guess I must make him smile.

We all do who are his Son's.